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Sunday, July 1, 2007

Unwritten Laws


Unwritten laws are a fact of life. You won't find them in any law books, and any repercussions for breaking them are more likely to be social than legal. Common examples of such laws might be: You don't leave Home Depot without spending at least $100. You don't date your best friend's ex (or at least not for 6 months after the break up if you agree with the men of the square table). You don't feed any bears you might stumble upon while camping. You don't congratulate someone on their upcoming new addition to the family until you know they are for sure pregnant. You don't leave your laptop on top of your car and drive off...EVER.

Being back in Ohio, I'm reminded of one more such law. You don't grow up and/or live in Ohio (and particularly in Columbus) without being a Buckeye fan. It's hard to find anything around here that doesn't have a Block O overtly or subliminally branded in or on it. In fact, I'm certain Woody Hayes - God rest his soul - would be a shoe-in to be elected Governor of Ohio even today if only someone found a loophole that allowed his sacred name to get on the ballot.

In a sub-section of the Buckeye 'law', there is apparently an unwritten sub-law stating that if you move away from the great state of Ohio, you are required to purchase at least one form of OSU memorabilia upon every subsequent return visit. Believe it or not, I'm already running out of occasions to wear the Ohio State shirts I already have, and I couldn't bring myself to buy the Brutus the Buckeye Speedos just yet [which is to say ever], so instead this time I bought a cool Nike OSU golf shirt. Should come in handy for the 1 time a year I play golf. I've demo'd the shirt in the picture above where I'm performing another unwritten law for Ohioans... O-H-I-O!

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